The Granola-Ebola Connection

I saw an flyer for Homeboy Sandman on the subway.

He's a hip-hop musician, I believe, though I haven't heard his music yet. In black lettering on a light blue 8.5 x 11 sheet of paper, Homeboy (Mr. Sandman?) advertised that he could get "your friend who interns at the record company promoted."

It was his clever way of saying that he is hip-hop juggernaut just wanting to be discovered. A bold statement with some subway swagger. Grabbed my attention. for sure. His other sign, just feet away and covering an ad for Fox 5 News, showcased his lyrical wares:

"I got more bars than granola promoters, I caught Ebola and didn't notice."

Though I admire the word play, there are several layers of confusion for me here.

First, I don't know what a granola promoter is. I would guess he/she makes less money than a boxing promoter and is more likely to have a beard. Maybe he was referring to Johnny Granola-Seed. But when referencing granola promotion, I think you have to be more specific.

Second, I don't know what 'bars' he's referring to. I don't think it's granola bars, that's too literal for Homeboy. Thirst parlors? Gold bars seem a likely candidate, as something of value that would be worth bragging about.

Third, I don't know why he would boast in a song that he caught Ebola. From all accounts, it's an awful thing to catch. A day-ruiner.

Fourth, on top of advertising the contraction of said disease, I can't fathom why you would broadcast your ignorance of it. Does being asymptomatic contribute to street cred? Or maybe he's saying he's so tough that debilitating viruses don't affect him? Is oblivious the new enlightened?

In the end, I have to throw up my hands, because I have no idea what Homeboy Sandman is talking about. But here's the thing: he got me thinking, specifically about granola and ebola. And that hasn't happened in a long time.