Newsiness.

I always enjoy walking the four blocks of sidewalk to my subway station every morning. As I am about to walk down the stairs, my friendly newsman always says "Good morning. Have a good day!" and I get a brief glimpse of the headlines for the day.

Though I don't read it (and realize it should not be considered a reputable source of news), it's impossible not to admire the New York Post's headlines. I really enjoy them. They are masterfully over the top, written by pun ninjas with scythe-like wit. I often wonder if the people that write them ever chuckle to themselves at the cheesiness. Do they ever just shake their head and say "No, no we can't. This is just too much. We are a newspaper." My guess -- they never do. They revel in it: being the news and a parody of the news all at once. Case-in-belabored-point, this morning's headline.

The people at the Post probably couldn't believe their luck at the breaking of the salmonella-tomato story. I'm sure the editorial staff deliberated only momentarily before going to print with this: